Because.......

I am a mother of six children, one grandchild and one on the way, in less then three months....I would do completely anything in my might to safeguard my children.. I mean anything....It's both my satisfaction and duty....I always thought, this was or should be the case for most mothers and fathers, correct?

The fortunate part for my children, I live my life to love, educate, and protect them..

What is unfortunate....

This wasn't the case in my childhood.

So my mother sent G and I to grand mom's house to live...

I told you the reasons why in the last entry...

But,

That wasn't the case.

Grand mom, allowed my uncle (who is no kin to her) to come and go through her door anytime he wanted...

Do you understand what i just said?

She allowed my rapist, my uncle, to come and go as he pleased.

What about me?

Why would she allow this to happen?

Why didn't she give me what all grandmother's are suppose to?

Where was mine grandmother who offers;

Care
Warmth
Peace
Love
Fairness
Sweetness
Patience
Spunk
Support
Forgiveness
Compassion
healing touch
wisdom
and security?

No....

Once i took residency at grand mom's, the rape had ceased...he no longer touched me....

Knowing what happened to me....knowing how he used me.....knowing how my innocence was stolen....i grew up as a protector...i felt the need to watch his every move over the years...protecting all my little cousins..threatening him with evil glares....uttering belligerent words...expressing to him, I'll kill you if you touch one of these girls....this is how i grew through the years..in grand mom's house.